And Jan says:

“You are living in a bubble.”

Living in a bubble is

Enriching and fragile
at the same time —

and it must be.

A bubble can burst at any time
and is held together by tenderness and love,
softness and “care for” the other,
ourselves

and our relation.

Zitta 7/7/2014

Dream:

I am the mother of 3 newborn babies,

# 1 = Mix elephant/camel
trunk/humps

# 2 = Human child
Blonde curly hair,
Sitting up

# 3 = Mix Elephant / kangaroo
Trunk in pouch – for comfort
Eyes closed,
after 2 minutes eyes open
they are bright, staring and shiny

All 3 babies are app. 10 inches long.

# 3 runs away – wants to play a catching game with me
I scoop “It” up, carry “it” tight.

“It” starts eating of me
The other babies crawl onto me and do the same

People walk by
I mime to them
about my dilemma
They don’t understand

I am being eaten up
by my own creation…


Zitta 2023

The phone,
The cell phone:

In our time
In this time
In my time

Is taking over.

A phone is not:

Arguing with you
with anyone

It is strangling itself
in superiority


Zitta 5/11-2023

Paavo and Brynn are sitting in the couch
in deep conversation
(Larry and I are in the kitchen)
I offer – and make – them each a cup of tea

Then Lia comes – with her sewing machine
Sitting at the kitchen table
she sews a piece of clothing – for me
Then makes herself some tea
and joins the others in the living room

Nick calls, says he has a 3-day weekend and is almost here
He arrives – gets some tea
and join the others in the living-room

The talk becomes of Didde and Jan,
The 2 who are missing
Didde steps through the door
She helps me with some paperwork, sitting at the kitchen table,
Then joins the others in the living room

Nick calls Jan, who has just finished baking Christmas Cookies (Learned from Moster Lise)
Nicks ask him over,
he comes
We talk, drink tea and eat cookies
I make a cucumber sandwich for Larry (who doesn’t eat cookies)

We all sit around in the living room
relaxed, together, and Happy

I am so grateful for all of them – all of this

Later: I go outside
To connect with nature
To Be without Doing….
It is VERY hard



Zitta ……… 1/8-2023

What the children know:

Give of yourself
freely
Don’t judge
Don’t compare

In school
children learn
Learn what?
To be Better
To be Better than someone else?

Or to share – and help each other?

The “I” is just a concept
It changes all the time

One becomes all
and
All becomes “Me”


Zitta 3/31 2021

You gave me a white silk dress
I wore it with Glee – it became Me
I “spilled”, and now have a dirty spot
The spot became Me

You discarded the dress
Threw it in the corner – like a rag
That was Me

We laid there
The dress and I
Till one day
We were needed
And were pulled
out of the corner
Washed and Ironed
– As good as new – almost
Was that Me?

The spot became invisible
Was it still there? – Me?
Had it faded with time?
Or was a patch sewn over it?

Was that Me – Underneath?


Zitta….. December 2022

Dying is the one thing
you can’t share

I am strong
Like a bulldozer – strong
I move
Despite all odds
I go forward
I live
…..But is this “force” living

Larry is “weak”
He is so strong – “he dares to be weak
He is

I am living because
I am living despite

He is just living


Zitta 2021

Plans are safer on the ground
– but are meant to fly


Our feelings are our most genuine path to knowledge


Education is not the filling of a bucket
It is the lighting of a fire

It seems
death comes slowly
overtakes you
secretly
not suddenly

you get used to it
it gives you time
– time for what?

do you
are you
ready
will you ever be
are you always
ready

death is “the end”
the end of a trip
the end of a love-affair
the end of you
the end of what you thought was “you”

There is always more
more you
more life
more life without you

all the life
I don’t live
just pours out of me
to be lived
to be felt

I don’t know how to die
I’ve never done it before…


Zitta 2021

You are scared
that by cleaning up
your drawers
you will find the roaches
in the corners

I am scared
that by cleaning up
my drawers
I will find emptiness
– clean and orderly emptiness

I am scared
that if I speak
I’ll never stop
and will lose all
– we both will

I am scared
that if I speak my words
the feelings
my feelings
will get lost
in the words

I am scared
that being unhappy together
is better than being alone

I am scared
that if I open my heart
– and eyes
– to the tears
we will all drown

Zitta 2021